Weighed Down...

In high school I was a skinny girl. I never paid attention to what I ate, I didn't exercise (unless you count spending countless hours dancing in your room as exercise) and I most definitely took my figure for granted. I guess I never even had the thought in my head that one day I would actually have to work at losing weight. I got pregnant with Ethan when I was 23 years old....and gained 50 pounds. When I got pregnant, I still would've considered myself pretty thin...but not so much afterward. I never lost all the weight - probably all but about 12 pounds. I hated that I couldn't get rid of that weight, but then again didn't really do anything about it. Then came my pregnancy with Drew. I was already starting out 12 pounds heavier and I gained 40 pounds. Again, I didn't lose all the weight and was stuck at an ever higher weight than before. So, with my third pregnancy, I vowed not to gain a ton of weight. I did decent and only gained about 30 pounds, but started the pregnancy at my heighest weight yet. Now, most people don't look at me and think I'm overweight...but when I look at myself, I see GROSS!! You girls know what I mean. We are all so much harder on ourselves than anyone else could ever be.

I can't really be mad though. I hate exercise and I love to eat - especially junk! So a couple of days ago, I decided that it's time to start taking responsibility for myself and to stop lying to myself. This weight is NOT coming off by doing nothing. This weight is NOT coming off by having dessert every night. This past Monday, I started my diet. I'm not going crazy - just a slim fast for breakfast, a Lean Cuisine and yogurt for lunch and then a normal dinner - with no seconds. And no snacks after dinner!! I have treated myself to half a Hershey bar - which is only 105 calories. I have also started doing Jillian Michaels 30 day shredd and Just Dance on the Wii with the kiddos (great workout!). I have stuck to this for four days now, which is pretty great for me. I am holding myself accountable...but you guys hold me accountable too, okay? Because I am almost 30 and the weight isn't going to get any easier to lose!

Girlfriends

I've always been the type of girl that got along better with guys. Don't get me wrong - I had girl friends in high school - just not an abundance of them. I hung out with more guys and seemed to get along better with them. For some reason the whole "girl" scene has always seemed catty to me. Girls tend to get angry over stuff that I don't generally think matters. BUT I have come to realize that even though for me having great girl relationships is rare, the ones I have are amazing. I think its important for all of us girls to have other girls in our lives - we can relate to each other better than we can relate to guys. My girlfriends always back me up, but then again they are not afraid to call me out when I may be overreacting on something. My girlfriends give me peace of mind when I feel like I'm going crazy. My girlfriends assure me that my feelings are valid. AND I laugh the hardest with these girls. So even though I've spend the majority of my life getting along better with guys (for the most part), I couldn't live without my girls. So this is a big shout out to the girls that have been there for me through whatever crisis I may be having on a certain day, have been there to remind me that other people do go through the same stuff as me, and to laugh with me. You all are very important in my life and I love ya!